


Detective work

by Keenir



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-24
Updated: 2012-04-15
Packaged: 2017-11-02 11:43:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/368645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Keenir/pseuds/Keenir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the near future, when the spell is broken, Emma meets some of the town's Private Investigators.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Two of Storybrooke's Private Investigators walked in.

Emma tried to ignore the fact that it was a dark and story evening - _we've been having a lot of those ever since Gold and Regina died and half the town remembered who they really are._ But that included the guy who was almost bouncing off the walls, and now half-singing:  
♪I know you,  
♪I know you too;  
♪And we'll all have fun with you♪

Emma shut her eyes long enough to remind herself that she wasn't allowed to kill the Cat in the Hat. No matter how rhymingy he got. Or how many bizarre creatures he found in cubboards and closets. Or how pissed Henry was that he and everyone else hadn't been returned to a fantasy land.

The P.I.s looked like this wasn't anything strange to them. In fact, "Encyclopedia can't come," said the guy who looked a little like a blonde Satan. "He's been grounded."

"I suppose we'll have to make do," Emma said from where she sat behind her Sheriff's desk, trying to remember if Encyclopedia was a fantasy person, or the name of someone who hadn't yet broken through the spellcasing. "You're Sam Spade, right?" Emma asked.

"I am indeed."

_Well what do you know, reading the Maltese Falcon actually came in handy._

"I'm Irene," the young lady said. "I understand you need our help?"

"Irene Adler?" Emma asked, nodding in answer to Irene's question.

"You _are_ well-informed, Sheriff. That was my maiden name."

"So you're Irene Holmes now?"

She looked at Emma with a gaze of horror. "Heavens no. My name is Irene Wolfe."


	2. A day before

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nero Wolfe and Irene Adler have a....discussion.

Nero Wolfe rubbed at his eyes, wiping away the last bits of the lying ether. He sat on the stairs, not really looking at the door in front of him; more important matters were on his mind. _I must find if there are or not any suitable Brownstones here in Maine. **After** I eat._

The door opened and Nero recognized the woman there immediately: "Irene Adler," Nero said.

"Mister Nero Wolfe," Irene replied calmly. A day ago, they had been Mr. and Mrs. Godwin; fictive names bestowed by the curse.

"I must confess my startlement," Nero said.

"That I returned."

"Yes, phrased so succinctly. The Godwins had a great love for one another - uh, we do not."

 _One could say 'an epic love',_ Irene thought, but forebore from saying, as she knew how uncomfortable it would make Nero. _Even my one-time client Odysseus would agree it was epic._ "Nor are you and I enemies or rivals, Nero. Slightly axiomatic, but it is the case."

Nero nodded. "Then what do you - suggest?"

"A continuance. We remain together until or unless we have reason to part company."

"That is to me reasonable. We will have to get a cook." _Neither of us is as talented in the kitchen as the Godwins were._

"Yes," Irene said. "And, now that that is settled, I have news of our fellow investigators."

"Yes, our friends, here and there."

"Cadfael is considering re-taking Holy Orders."

"And what of Marple, she who was his wife until the end of the curse?"

"She is keeping an eye on Crux, who experienced a mild stroke before he remembered he is Poirot. Derek Storm and Nikki Heat are out on a case. And Kate Shugak went out for some air."

Nero was about to express sympathy for them, when it hit him: "There is more - I hear it in your voice."

"Kim remains unaccounted for," Irene said.

"That is indeed troubling. He could be anywhere."

"Perhaps we should hire the Chosen One to clean up her mess."

Nero smield at Irene. "Following dinner. And we should as well locate a quality Brownstone."

"Consistency was always a fine quality with you. Let us do so."


End file.
